Saturday, February 3, 2024

A pop star's raw and stinging honesty

Much is known about the tortuous life of award-winner pop icon, but fighting to take control of life back from patriarchal exploitation and control deserves to be read as an honest autobiography about motherhood, freedom, and hope. Born into a disturbed childhood, Britney was a little girl with big dreams who only wanted her dad to stop drinking, and her mom to stop yelling. None of it worked her way, instead she was precocious to drinking, smoking and boys at an early age. Losing control over oneself at an early age made her guilty conscience with a lot of shame, with the family considering her to be plain bad. Admitting to her own bad deeds, Britney believed in karma catching up with her.

The Woman in Me tells a focused story of a teenager who learnt too early in her life that the music industry, or for that matter the whole world, is set up more for men.  Britney’s career was not spared, she was subjected to disempowering narratives. Conservatorship was legally thrust on her, which is usually served on people who lack mental capacity to do anything for themselves.  Considered as a teenager corrupting the youth, she was perceived as dangerous for the society. To get her back on track, her father was entrusted with conservatorship to control Britney and her resources. She was literally treated as if she was a criminal or predator by her own parents.

What made the state of California pursue the conservatorship upon Britney? Why the court-appointed lawyer didn’t help her? And, why a man like her father – an alcoholic, a failed businessman, and an abusive parent – was allowed to be her legal guardian to control everything she had? Britney’s freedom was curtailed while her earnings were siphoned to help their cash flow. Neither could she contact her kids nor was allowed access to her mobile phone. Such indignation persisted for no less than thirteen years. 

Anyone in such situation would have been pushed to a breaking point. But not Britney, who reflected the enduring power of music and singing. ‘Singing takes me to a mystical place where anything is possible’. As a teenage pop star, she was eyeballed as a pretty sex object, a double denim-wearing singer. On top, the conservatorship tenure left her with a mix of shock and sadness. She was literally exiled from herself for over a decade. Out of the inordinate ordeal, she now wants not to be someone who other people want but to actually find herself. 

The Woman in Me is an honest reflection on what others thought about the pop star, and how she was subjected to constant bullying and relentless abuse for not confirming to the template. Success has a cost that the pop star had to bear for being half herself and half fictional. Britney confesses that fame is real for those who know how to make fame work for them. For her, there was an essence of real life missing from it. Perhaps, the reason for her to be rebellious and shave her head in public in 2007 to demonstrate it. 

Written with remarkable candor and humor, Britney reveals all that she went through her momentous but disturbing career. Without doubt, she could not have been anything but a singer which helped her express herself exactly as she wanted to be seen and heard. ‘Singing took me into the presence of divine.’ Multiplatinum Grammy awards, and more than 100 million records sold worldwide bear testimony to her fledgling singing career. What comes out clear is that the world is rarely kind to successful women. 

It is hard to imagine what all a carefree popstar had to endure; for being lonely at the top. It is hard to fathom that someone who could perform for thousands at a time could backstage be gripped with panic. She has come out stronger to tell her story. ‘You have to speak that you are feeling even if it scares you.’ Freedom for Britney means being goofy and silly, being able to make mistakes, and learn from them. From being passive and pleasing, Britney has come out being a strong and confident woman. The story is indeed inspiring.

The Woman in Me conveys optimistic narrative for women to stand for what they are, or what they intend to become. What kindles a ray of hope is that women themselves have woken up to the cost of being subjugated to the opportunity of asserting their identity. 

The Woman in Me 
by Britney Spears
Simon & Schuster, London
Extent: 275, Price: Rs. 999.

First published in Deccan Herald on Feb 4, 2024.

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